The New Liberal Dictionary:

A joint effort by Nero & El Cid

In this new age of liberal enlightenment, it is important that change be an all encompassing force.  While there must be focus for the world's most harrowing problems, we must also bring about change to the smallest fundamentals of our existence.  What better instance of this than in the structure of our language? In this new golden age, we finally have the opportunity to change and eliminate the language and rhetoric of division. Too long has our insistence on free speech divided us as a country and alienated the world.  Words have power and the words of hate in our language have caused nothing but hurtful feelings and fear in the hearts of the people. Indeed the hateful rhetoric of rabble-rousers like Rush Limbaugh threatens to create unrest in good souls that would otherwise find joy in our magnaminous president.

Following the lead of our new Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano, we can now replace outdated and inflammatory terms like "terrorist attack." The more appropriate, peaceful and non-judgmental phrase "man-made disaster" is superior. Phrases such as "terrorist attack" could create harmful feelings between innocent everyday Americans and the people who want to slaughter them in the night. Bush style rhetoric serves to escalate a tolerable state of affairs into an immoral mar. After all, terrorists are people too, just people who want to kill other people. There is no reason that we should devalue their behavior with barbaric terms, that just isn't enlightened.

We have decided to follow the Secretary's example and revise the our language so that the fear evoked by provacative rhetoric can be replaced by new understanding. Only through the wisdom of the chosen can we now present to you a new dictionary for citizens of this new enlightened age.

Terrorist Attack: Man-made disaster. (Per Politico.com)

Global War on Terror: Overseas Contingency Operation (Per Los Angeles Times)

Terrorist: Disenfranchised believer of an adverse yet acceptably violent lifestyle.

War: A lack of supervised diplomacy which results in disagreement between nations, organizations, or parties. Generally the result of American corporate greed, Republicans or any combination thereof. 

National Security: The protection of one's nation from domestic and international problems it itself has caused and is responsible for.  Best achieved through usage of a civilian force armed with awareness flyers and danger whistles.

Economics (or Obamanomics, if you will): Spending money one does not have; to buy things one cannot afford;  convincing colorful nations (China or Zimbabwe) to claim accrued debt, then allow them to charge extortitive interest rates for years.

Sustainable Development:  Development of the government or related function that carelessly spends money taxed from citizens.

Domestic Growth: